Hustle and Bustle

I had this problem last year too. I go into the season with good intentions. Knowing this is the season we celebrate our Savior's birth. That we give gifts to one another that we put precious thoughts into hoping they are going to love. We hang wreaths on our doors, put trees in a lot of rooms and decorations everywhere.

But, I'm still not feeling very Christmas-y "yet"! I'm hoping this weekend is a BIG turnaround for me! My hubby and I both have this weekend off and although having a Friday off together is usually fun, today, it's full of appointments and running kids to their appropriate social engagements.

Tomorrow, however, we have NOTHING planned! So, maybe Christmas lights. Christmas movies that have been DVR'd.

Sunday is a really big day at our church. It's called Family Christmas. It's a chance for our church to recognize families in our church that are living the "Christmas story" in their everyday lives. People show up to church, having no clue they were picked to be a part of the day to be honored! I've never been to one (we've only been at our new church, well, this is our second Christmas) and I've heard awesome stories. So, we've made a plan. We are going to early service. EARLY service is so hard to do, but we are doing it. Since we don't have a para-pro at church right now, we have someone helping L at home. We are going to see if L's babysitter, who is AWESOME by the way, will then meet us at my parent's church, where we will be showing up late, but I am hoping to catch some of my nephew's Christmas program! Whew!!!

So, there you go. I've had a lot of work stuff going on, but I shall not go into detail.....for now.

In band news, quite a few PB episodes, but they are my own fault. You would think after having this thing 6 months, I'd learn. Still learning I guess. A new complication has arose it's ugly head, however. My back is out. Yep, did you know you can throw your back out LOSING weight? Apparently, all that fat was holding my core muscles into place around my spine. Now that it is dissipating, no core muscles. So, my doctor tried a couple of different muscle relaxers for a few weeks, but PT is where I've ended up. Yep, doctor ordered workouts. Guess it's the only way to actually get me to the gym.

My weight loss is currently at is 94 pounds. It's so hard for me to grasp that I was carrying around all that weight. I did have someone at work say something to me yesterday, I brushed off, but was like, really? Did you really just say that? We were having a going away breakfast for an intern and I chose not to eat anything (pure will power, which by the way has been TOTALLY lacking this time of year...and those bagels were my favorite, but I'm figuring bagels are no longer my friend since I've had the band installed). Someone made a comment about it and I said well, I've had like 50 oz. of liquid already this morning and I'm good for now. And someone else said something about my surgery. A lot of the people I work with knew me before my surgery but there are a few new people. Anyway, one of the new people said (I had mentioned yesterday I had lost like 92 lbs.) something like oh that's great, even when you have more to go....really? Sigh. Is that the youth of America?

Let me end on a positive note. I hope that everyone loves the gifts we bought this year for Christmas. I know my daughter will. The one gift we bought had to be shipped from the UK and was threatening not to be here in time for Christmas. Well, it came on Wednesday!!!! YEAH!! I just hope my son likes his gifts just as much. He didn't ask for anything for himself this year. It's been a tough couple of weeks, autism-wise, but when I see letters like this, it reminds me what a sweet, tenderhearted little boy he is.....

Catching Up

First off, I hope everyone had the happiest of Thanksgivings!!!!  This was my first Thanksgiving banded and well, let's just say it was interesting and I am still learning things about my band 6 months later!!!  I had a PB episode that day and another that weekend.

My weight has been fluctuating, which has been a high source of stress for me. So, I've decided to take a bit of a break. No, I'm not going to eat everything in sight, but my brain needs a break from the obsession roller coaster.  Right now I'm just shy of 90 lbs. that's in less than 9 months. That's pretty amazing. So, I just need to give myself a break. I was really hoping for that 100 lb. mark before the end of the year, but it doesn't seem like its going to happen. With the holidays and shopping, parties and work, and most of all reflecting on my Savior's birth (which I need to do more), I really need to relax.

So, I hope all is well with you. I'll checking again,hopefully sooner than later!!!

Down on Myself - Pity Party Post - You've Been Warned :)

Well, I saw a new number on my scale. 91.4.

And then as quick as I saw it, it went away. Because I gained back 3 lbs. Do you get down on yourself when this happens to you? Does this happen to you? Oh please tell me I'm not the only one.

I'm not giving excuses, we were celebrating my hubby's birthday which falls on Thanksgiving this year.

Other good things have been happening too. My daughter got on the A-B honor roll at school!! She rocked it this marking period. My son is doing really well. We have rough days still but I'm now seeing more good than bad.

I guess since I lean toward this being a WLS blog and the vast majority of my readers are right there with me, I tend to mostly talk about that. I was SOOOOO excited to see that number and then to make such awful choices and let it slip away is discouraging. Like feeling like I'm back to old ways. Then I try to remind myself when I go through the grocery store I'm not making the same choices I used to. No more Hostess fruit pies for breakfast. Or chocolate covered doughnuts with Mountain Dew. Right?!

I'm, coincidentally, "feeling the weight" of Thanksgiving upon me after making such bad choices for myself this weekend.

Sorry for the pity party post.

TTT, a day late and a dollar short

1.  Had a quick appointment with my nutritionist just to kinda check in and see where I am at.  Apparently, I'd lost 9 lbs. last month.  Sure didn't feel like 9 lbs.  I guess that's the problem with weighing yourself everyday, you don't really SEE the results like that.  Going to try to not weigh myself as much (yeah, right).  I was thrilled to hear how much I had lost, but man, when you weigh yourself so much, you really don't see it, do you?

2.  My NP popped her head in for a brief moment to ask how I did and when she heard how much I had lost, she gave me a warning.  I say popped her head in because if I had "officially" seen her, I'd be paying for it, but my nutritionist is free.  She told me that some Roux-en-Y patients end up with gall bladder issues after their surgery and they start losing a good majority of their weight.  Apparently, I'm keeping a rate of weight loss with Roux-en-Y patient vs. a Lap Band patient.  So, they want me to keep an eye out for gall bladder issues.  Should I have any, my bariatric surgeon could remove my gall bladder.....  Did you know this was complication?  I didn't.  Sigh.

3.  My daughter has been working her BUTT off in school.  7th grade is HARD!  But, she is reaping the rewards.  First marking period is over and although I don't have her "official" report card yet, I can keep up with her grades online and as long as they stayed the same (forgot to check at the end of the week of the marking period), she has all A's and 1 B.  AND the B was in Gym!!  Way to go M!  She was rewarded with a new game for the Wii she really wanted.....would have been a great Christmas gift, but she deserves it!

4.  L has been doing pretty good in school too.  We just have a lot of behavioral stuff to work with him on the ASD.  I think those things will come along as he gets older, more mature, more understanding!!

5.  L had his birthday parties (yes, you read right parties....we had 2) this weekend.  We had our first sleepover with cousin E, who is his dad's younger brother's son.  They are only 7 months apart.  I don't have his parents permission to put his pic on my blog, yet, so you just have pics of my kids from this weekend to look at :)  E, is very good at trying to figure out L.  They are buddies!!

 

 

 

 

6.  We both had election day off this year.  Actually, we all had election day off this year.  The kids were home with us too!  P and I got up and went to polls pretty early in the morning and voted.  Here's a pic from the morning.  I apologize in advance for no make up on me and the weird pic face he tends to do.......sigh.

7.  My darling hubby is an awesome daddy!  My parents bought our son a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Secret Sewer Lair Playset, while my in-laws awesomely bought all the TMNT to go with the playset!!  However, the playset, has to be put together.  Here is a hard working Daddy, tired after a 10 hour day at work, and roughly a 2 hour drive to and from work, working on putting it together.  It's a 2 day project to say the least :)  (P.S.  I took this pic with Instagram)

8.  My church is doing a Pinterest party for our ladies Christmas party and I have so many ideas on what to do for it!  I am going to try to go out today and get the supplies for the things I need to get it done....or maybe tomorrow...yeah, tomorrow might be better!!

9.  It's getting quite cold here!  Winter coats, hats and gloves have come out of our closets and onto our bodies!!  We have not seen any snow but I bet it'll happen sooner than later!

10.  It's almost time for our tree!!!  I'm getting excited about putting our decorations up!  We always do it the day after Thanksgiving (which coincidentally is my hubby's birthday this year as well).  I'm paying a friend come give the house a good clean before we put the tree up that week so I feel fresh and clean before the holidays start!  I think I might be more excited about that maybe.......any moms or women in general out there get that?  Just me?  I know it can't be just me!!

Halloween 2 Days Later...Oops!

Sorry for the late post, but we've been busy :)

Here is a pic of our girl, who is growing up, way too fast!!  Any guesses on "Who" she is???  Our blogger friend, Sarah, from UK, has the best chance!!

 

 

Here is our little guy!  Tomorrow is his birthday.  MAJOR post on that tomorrow!  But, he is an ANGRY Bird, and well, he kinda fit his name this night (I don't know if he was having a bad ASD night, but he was complaining his knees were hurting - growing pains maybe?).  He was really into the whole Trick or Treating thing for about 30 minutes and then the last 30 minutes he was trick or treating he was just grouchy and done!  So, he left with his dad about 30 minutes early.

 



Today, I went to visit L at school with cupcakes for his class to celebrate his birthday!!  Here is a pic of him.  It's not a very good one, but I was trying not to get any other kids in the picture because I was putting it on the internet and didn't want to have their faces on it.

Really quick on the band note, I did hit the goal I was hoping for!  I am officially down 88.8 :)

Whew.  We made it through that plateau.  Any other time in my life, diet wise, I would have given up.  Seriously...would have just said, forget about it, it's not working, it's not worth it, let's eat!

This time, I went back to basics, jumped back on the "band wagon" (see what I did there??) and well, it's starting to come down again.

Whew.  I made it through.

I am so close to another one of my personal goals, I'm talking like 0.6 lbs away.  It's really exciting.

This morning's weigh in was good.  I'm officially down 87.4 lbs.  I've noticed for me the biggest thing is my protein.  My protein count HAS to be high.  Like mega-high.  I know when I went for my nutrition appointments they said originally 60-80 grams a day.  Then a month later they said they are finding people are having more success closer to the 80 gram mark.  I asked if I could bump mine up, I'm closer to 100-110 grams a day.  The nutritionist said the biggest thing to remember is not to have more than 45 grams per meal. 

I have also really bumped up that water intake.  I know a lot of you kick butt in the water department, like half of your weight in ounces, I can't do that.  I feel like a rock star if I get 4 - 16.9 ounce bottles in me.  I try to drink 3 between leaving for work and returning home and one while at home at night.  If I get one in while driving into work, two while at work and then one at home, that about does it for me.

So, here I am, a happy bandster again.

What I'm not happy about is the weather.  I can't complain about our weather here with all the poor people on the east coast enduring what they are, bless their hearts.  I hope if you are on that side of our country, you are safe and dry and your home is safe. 

We are just getting a piece of Sandy here and my daughter's school is actually without power today because of it.  So, she and I are home today.  She's enjoying time alone with no brother to bother her.  She's going to be able to play on the Wii and watch tv, but also get some studying and reading in for school as well. 

Halloween is tomorrow, the weather is supposed to be awful, but see I feel bad even saying that because there are kids on the east coast who can't even trick or treat.  Awful.  Awful.  Sigh.

But, to brighten your day just a touch, my new blog friend Jen over at What you Lookin at Skinny?? has pics up from her Halloween weekend....check out her hubby and then look my two from 2 years ago.......I told her I would post my almost 5 year old (then, he's almost 7 now) costume to show her!!  Yes, they were Scooby and Daphne.  I loved the themed costumes....sadly this year they are two totally different things.  Things they love, but not related.

Blogging Blah!

I know I haven't been around.....sorry.

 

I've been in a funk about my weight loss and quite frankly when that is what your blog is supposed to be about, it's kinda hard to get on your blog and talk about it. Especially when you want to be that encouraging voice in other's ears. I do want to be honest and open so that anyone who is really wanting to understand this journey can really know what it's like, but honestly, some days, I don't feel like it.

 

Good news, I'm on a upswing, but it's hard work. All of you who are on this same journey know, this is hard work. Gaining weight was easy. Eat. How hard, right? I mean we all have to eat to live. But, what you do to yourself mentally after is the difficult part.....I never really thought I mental issues with food until now. Ugh. I should have known. I think I always really did kinda know deep down, but I pushed it so deep down, I pretended it wasn't there.....

 

So, back to the good news. I called my office because quite frankly I've been eating like crap and getting really down on myself questioning on if I needed a fill or not. I've been really not wanting another fill because I'm only a few months into this and already I'm at 6.5 out of 11 cc's and really want to have wiggle room as time goes on and not "use up" all my cc's this early.

 

So, I called my office and made my appointment (oops, already had one). Then I emailed my nutritionist some questions. It took 3 emails to get a straight answer.... :-/ That was FRUSTRATING. I have been in the room with her and asked her a question and she never gave me a flat out answer....kinda makes me worry about her....anyway, I've REALLY pumped up my protein intake and it seems to be working. I've figured out some numbers.

 

It’s been 34 weeks of weight loss for me.

 

Since then, I’ve lost 86 lbs.

That’s an average of 2.5 lbs a week.

I started at the beginning of March and thru May 21^st (which was my surgery date) I lost 25 lbs, that’s 12 weeks roughly.

That was an average of 2.08 lbs a week.

So, there have been 34 weeks total of weight loss minus the 12 weeks prior to my surgery that means it’s only been 22 weeks since my surgery.

86 lbs total weight loss since I started back in March, 25 lbs of that was before my surgery.  86 – 25 is 61 lb. since my surgery.

So, since my surgery I’m averaging 2.77 lbs. a week.

Did you catch all that?  My NP and nutritionist both are really telling me I need to give myself a break and quit stressing out, but I ate really crappy the last few weeks and I know it’s a slippery slope.  Plus I really do have high expectations for myself.  I’d love to see that elusive 100 lb. mark before the end of the year.  Can you imagine, 100 lbs. in 9 months?  AWESOME!!  I mean I am gonna have to get on my horse (not literally) to get it done in the 2 months we have left.  14 lbs. is still 14 lbs.  I still have so much weight even after that 100 is gone.  That’s the saddest part of all. 

I am so proud though.  People are really noticing and I am getting a lot of compliments.  It’s very kind of people who are being my encouragers.  I really hope you have people in your lives who are doing that for you!

It’s FRIDAY people!  My bills are paid for the week, we have money left, now I need to figure out the menu for the week!  What is your household eating???

TTT

1.  I haven't felt like posting because I'm at the same weight because I ate like crap for the last few days (I'm actually sitting here waiting for part of a stupid piece of pizza to make its way down not fun).

2. My birthday was this week. We had a lot of fun. Food. And togetherness. Love it.

3.  Autism stinks. My little guy was out of school for a week (yes, I missed a lot of work at my new job) and he got off schedule and when he got back, he had an awful day. Sigh. Autism stinks.

4.  My job is good. I'm glad it's an assignment. It'll give us an opportunity to see if we really need me to work once my hubby's job schedule changes (OT maybe bye bye).

5.  My daughter had two vaccines today, my son teased her relentlessly. Little does he know in 4 weeks it'll be his turn.

6.  I really hate that this weight isn't melting off like it was. I know a lot is my choices now.

7.  My boy has his tiger cub meeting tonight. We had some major work to get him ready for tonight!!! Lots to prepare for this meeting!!

8.  I'm waiting for my new phone to get here. Come on already!!!!!!

9.  I've been getting bits and pieces of spam comments on my blog, do you?

10.  Go Tigers!!!  I'm not crossing it out to say, nah......I'm crossing it out to update because they DID IT!!!!  TIGERS ARE GOING TO THE WORLD SERIES!!!!  Way to go guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Quick Post with Pics

Here's a post with pics from our adventure on Sunday!  Maybe I'll do a TTT later ;)

 

Here's the whole family on the hay ride freezing (HATING my double chin, but trying to be a better mom and actually take pics of me so my kids have some of me later in life!!)!

 

Don't they look like they are in a line up?  Poor M!  We didn't realize it but her coat zipper had broken last year and she needed a zipper, so she wore a jacket of mine that is MUCH to big on me now, much less her!!  She's swimming in it!



 

L pretended the tall grass in the apple orchard was an anemone, like from Finding Nemo.

 

Beautiful girl who's growing up before our very eyes!

 

Just us :)  I love this man!!  Hate my double chin, but love this man!!!

 



I'm just plain tired!!!

To all of you that work out of your home, you get big props from me!!!

I do frequently work outside of our home, but it's been like 6 or 7 months since I did last and just the first two days are kicking my butt!!

Let me go back, when I got the call I let them know that it was really important to me that if my kids are sick, field trip, etc. that I would need to be the one to stay home with them.

Enter Murphy's law. L got a fever the night before I was supposed to start work. But, in this case I really didn't feel it was right to call in on my very first day. So, my mother-in-law has graciously helped us out by keeping him the last two days. Tomorrow however, he has mommy at home with him and I'm off on Fridays. So, we have a trip to our family doctor in the morning to see what's going on. His fever is down but this cough, ugh.

I've had a bit of an ego boost this week, I think I may have told you already last week about one, but I've had two people within a week not recognize me! Now, these are people I see quite frequently. One of them is my sister-in-law( who I adore) and the other one was my Pastor's wife who I see typically once, twice and sometimes even three times a week :) Thank you ladies!!!!!

In other band related news, I'm doing pretty good. I've upped my protein shake from an 8 oz. to a 12 oz. shake. That way I know I'm getting more protein in everyday.

We went with friends to a very fun cider mill on Sunday (I will post some pics tomorrow) and on our way we stopped at Hardee's. There is not one single band friendly thing to eat on that menu. Well, they did have grilled chicken and a turkey burger, but I would like to take them off the bun and I was driving. So, since I had such a big shake that morning (a knew I was going to be getting in some senseless doughnut calories in) that I was going to skip lunch. I know not the greatest choice, but honestly what I had in the shake is easily calorie and more protein then what I usually have breakfast and lunch combined anyway. I did let myself have a sweet tea and I took a couple bites out of P's burger a few small fries so I wasn't starving but I think it was just a better choice.

When I went back to work, I saw quite a few people who knew that I was having the surgery because I had just left like 6-8 weeks before it. So, I got a few questions about it. One of them I hadn't heard yet, "Do you throw up a lot?" I answered her honestly, nope, only 3 times in the 6 months since my surgery.

That was until that exact same night. P says I jinxed myself. I don't know if I ate the roast I made too quickly or the broccoli was too "I can't think of a good word to describe....vegatabley" or if my band has been a little tight due to stress but my mom-in-law stayed and ate with us and I was pretty miserable. After she left I just couldn't get past the feeling, finally I just ran (literally) to the bathroom. PB. And well, relief.

So, I'm not sure what I weigh because with work I can't weigh myself at the right time of day. I'll have to see tomorrow or Friday.

Hope you all are good!!!!!!!

NSV!

Well, I had a bit of a break in my plateau!!  Whew!  I now see a loss of 81 :)  YEAH!!!!!!!!!!

So, I am going back to work officially!  Tuesday is my first day back and my dress clothes do NOT fit!  Let me digress a bit....

There is a mom 2 mom Facebook group I was invited to.  It is AWESOME!!  I have sold so much stuff on it!  I didn't know exactly what I was going to do with all the money I had made until yesterday.  I'm due for a phone upgrade and since I am within a 30 day window I was welcome to do so by my carrier!!  Yippie!!!  I am getting the phone I want!  I feel kinda selfish! 

So, last week I tried to have a garage sale, but it was a bust!!  So, I pushed a bit more with this mom 2 mom group and it has been awesome.  I have sold all my clothes today that I had left over that were just WAY too big.

Which moves me onto my NSV.  Since I am going to work and need to look somewhat professional, my size 28 (yes you read right....sigh) pants just don't fit anymore.  They are fitting like clown pants on me.  So, I went into the store and tried on clothes.  I took in a 22 and 24 thinking the 22 was going to be too small.  Not only did they fit, I even was able to buy one pair in a size 20!!!!

My new coat for the winter is only one size down a 2X, but hey, I'll take it!!  I'm so stinkin' excited!

I even had to get new shoes because I've lost weight in my feet.....that's a little weird, right???

If you are new to this, or thinking about doing this, it's no joke.  There are tough moments in this process.  But, it can work!!  Keep it up and it works!!!!!!!  I'm even in a plateau and would not change it for the world!!!

TTT

Ten Things Thursday, here we go.....

1.  My appointment with my nutritionist didn't go like I had hoped it would. I get a little frustrated by her and I like her at the same time.   I was there looking for real answers as to my nutrition like how to increase my calories, I got nothing.

2.  What I have gotten this week is a ton of encouragement. Between her and my NP this is what they are telling me, that usually most WLS patients have a plateau somewhere either at the 3 or 6 month mark.  I just passed my 6 month mark. They also told me that I'm doing as well as most of their gastric bypass patients and am at the point of where a lot of their bandsters are at a year. They are encouraging me to continue what I've been doing and to start exercising.

3.  I did go to the gym twice last week. Why can I not get motivated to go? I hate exercising. No, I mean I hate it. I know it will help my weight loss but I just cannot seem to wrap my brain around that yet.

4.  I'm going back to work! Yep, my office called and they have a middle term (not too short term, not too long term) assignment they'd like some help with.

5.  Know what this means?? Shopping!!! That's right!! The thing I've been putting off needs to happen now. All of my dress clothes are huge on me and I can't go to work like that. So, tomorrow I am going shopping. For new shoes too. Because apparently I've lost some weight in my feet as well.

6.  So, I tried to have a garage sale last week and it was a total bust. No joke in the 5 hours over 2 days I sat in my very cold garage, I had one guy show up and the only reason I think he did is because he used to live in the house and he was being nosey!

7.  We have had some major special ed hurdles this week. My son's IEP we thought did not say he had adult assistance on it, but it does! Which means they were almost in for the fight of my life (glad we didn't have to see that, whew) because he needs to be in gen ed the vast majority of his day. His IEP I think even says least restrictive environment. Anyway, today his new para-pro started and he had a pretty good day overall!! Way to go buddy!!!!!

8.  My darling daughter is halfway through the first marking period and so far, straight A's!!!!! Awesome!!!!! I can see her grades and assignments online and kept telling her test scores to her, she didn't believe me ;) Took her for her ortho appointment today. She's very funny. Orange and black rubber bands for Halloween.

9.  Poor P after the next 2 days and next week's worth of work he will have worked 20 out of 21 days and like 10 hour days!!! He is such a hard worker!!! I love him!

10.  Um, tv shows have returned and they are um, awesome!!!! Grey's, Survivor, Amazing Race, Private Practice, Once Upon A Time, Revenge.....I watch too much tv.

Night all!!

P.S.  my Pastor's wife didn't recognize me this week :)

New Month, New Lap Band Post

Ok, we are at a stand still.  I was going to give myself 2 weeks before I called my office and well, I made it 6 days. 

I got so frustrated on Friday with the scale I told my husband that this weekend was a free for all.  I did not go too crazy or anything but I didn't keep track and well, if I wanted to eat it, I ate it.

Some things, were not good for me and I learned more lessons.  But, something was SUPER good. 

My best friend's mom is kinda known for desserts.  And well, she's been making cake balls lately.  We all had a baby shower to attend on Sunday she was making some for and my mom ended up jumping in to help her at 8:30 pm on Friday night to get them done. 

All I can say, is German Chocolate Cake Balls are now my favorite.  Oh, my.  They were sooooo good.  Good thing I only ate one.  I went back for a second one and they were all gone.  So, I ate a chocolate chip cake ball.  I was delicious as well.

Ok, back to lap band.

I called my NP today.  My band is sore.  I'm frustrated with the scale and just generally tired.  Well, she sounded happy to talk to me at first and then she sounded a little irritated with me.  I think she really is my biggest cheerleader, but I think when I do things wrong, she gets disappointed with me.  So, the conversation went something like this......

"Ok, are you weighing yourself everyday?"

"Yes, Dr. F (psychologist) said it was ok..."

"No, you have to stop doing that."

"Ok."

"How many calories are you eating?"

"Like an average of 900 (I had told her this before)."

"Like above 900 or below?"

"Probably below."

"Ok, that was probably fine before you had lost all this weight, but now your metabolism has changed and your body is trying to catch up to your metabolism change and well, that's just not enough calories anymore (I tried to ask her about this last time)."

"Well, how am I supposed to get more calories in with smaller portions?"

"You need to come in and see K (nutritionist).  Can you come in tomorrow?"

So, really the quotes aren't really quotes, per se, but you get the gist of the conversation.  She also said the soreness from my band is probably from me sleeping on it and to quit laying on it.  I've lost a lot of weight in a small window of time and my body is changing and well, I really like the trajectory we were on and I get so nervous that if we don't stay on the path, we are going to stray off it.  Anyone with me!!???

Sigh.  Oh lap band.  Don't fail me now!

Fills, I have questions for you!

How often do you/did you have fills?

How do you know when it's time for another?

Hello from the Land of Plateau

The view sucks from down here :)

I'm trying to have a good attitude!  I really am.  I decided this morning after literally yelling at my scale (like it's his fault....notice I gave him a gender of male....hmmmm, wonder what Freud would think of that?) that I have gone as far as I could with just the surgery and dieting.  It's time to get to working out.

WAHAHAHAHHHHHHH!!!!!

I hate to exercise.  No, I really do.  For you people who "like" to exercise, I just don't get it.  Maybe I will someday and I will look back on this and be like, remember when I hated working out.....I seriously doubt it though.

So, since I hate to workout, I really need to find something that packs a bunch of stuff in, in the least amount of time.  So, today I went to my gym and walked on the treadmill at an incline (first time ever....sigh) for ten minutes.  Then I decided, I really do want to be a runner someday, but if I don't start running, I never will be.  But how do you START running?  I guess you just go?  Right????  So, I know I have no endurance right now as far as running goes, so, just do some intervals.  So, I would do minute and a half here and there.  I did a total of 10 minutes of running (really it was probably jogging to a lot of people) and 30 minutes of walking and 10 of those minutes were at an incline.  I'm sure I will be sore.  But, I need to keep it up.

I also think I might need to get in and see my nutritionist.  I'm sure my calorie intake is too low.  Remember a while ago when they did my last fill they said worry about portions not numbers....well, now we need to worry about numbers apparently.

I've lost a total of 78.5 lbs since the beginning of March.  I'm not complaining.  But, I really like the trajectory I'm on and would like to continue, because I still have a lot to go.  I'm one of those people who probably "should have had" gastric bypass, but that just plain scares me.  So, I want to show the world that lap band is a good choice for me too!!

I have a bunch of personal life stuff too going on.  I'll tell you all about that another time.  Good stuff :)  Well, mostly.  Nothing too awful for sure ;)

Have a good night everyone!!!

Family

We had a lovely family weekend!! The only downfall of this weekend is that we may have spent a bit too much money. But let me breakdown of what we did. 

I got it in my head that I needed to sell a bunch of stuff that I had, but I did not know how much stuff we had in our attic!! My poor husband had major work to get it all down. We spent about two hours getting the stuff down and then beginning to organize and start throwing some stuff away (I can't even believe that I kept some of the things I did).

Then my poor L was begging for food practically. So, we decided to go to Rainforest Cafe. The last time we tried to go there M was little and she was soooooo not having it. We ended up paying for the drinks we had just ordered and left. This time we actually got to eat there. But, L has some auditory issues associated with his ASD so when the thunderstorms came on, someone needed to cover his ears for him. 

We then ran over to the Halloween store to see if they had the costumes my kids have chosen this year (sadly not themed as in years past). Both of my kids were not happy with all the "scary" stuff in the store and it didn't have either costume. 

Later that evening we saw Finding Nemo in 3D! L wears noise canceling headphones in the theatre so he can enjoy the movie and eat popcorn at the same time :)

They both got a new DS game with money they were either given and/or earned. 

Today we went to church where L had kids church and M had her jr. high class.

It's been a LOVELY weekend!!!!  

I didn't mention P's family work day because they postponed it. :(  He was quite shook up after the incident the other day. It was quite tragic. After everything was said and over, two people were killed. Awful. So thankful to God for protecting my husband. I know he was nowhere near the incident, but he had to hear a lot on his radio while it was happening, I'm glad he didn't have to see anything. 

Now I have to tackle my mess in my family room. Oh my!!  But between a mom to mom sale and a garage sale I'm hoping to get rid of most of it! Then we have cleaned out our shed, garage and attic!!!

Tonight in about 40 minutes is the Emmy Awards!! I'm very excited this year for some reason!! I love Mayim Bialik! I love her on The Big Bang Theory! If she doesn't win tonight, she will be robbed!!!

Hope everyone had a great weekend!!

Why is my port area so sore?

I need help!!

I'm a little freaked out that my port area has been very sore for almost a week now. Any suggestions on what could cause that!?!!!

Bad Day Yesterday

We had a bad day yesterday.  Like a REALLY bad day yesterday.

It started off fine.  L told me that he didn't feel good after he sneezed a couple of times, but I thought, hmmmm, he's just trying to get out of school.

Off to school my kids went and about 25 mins. or so after they left I get a call from the school saying the bus was still in route to the school but they got a call saying that L had gotten sick on the bus.  Sigh.

Poor buddy!  So, I asked if they wanted me to meet them on the route or at the school, they wanted me to meet them at the school.  So, armed with a new set of clothes, wash cloth and plastic bags, I went to the school a half an hour later (yes the bus route is that long).

Got him cleaned up and home and just as I was walking in the door I get a text from my husband saying, don't worry I'm not fired but I'm coming home soon.  What?!?!???  What does that mean???

So, as I'm trying to pray for him and not trying to panic and freak out about that text, which by the way, he got a text back saying, um, you can't send me texts like this without more detail, I got clothes into the washer and L into the tub.

P texted me back more detail.  A massive work violence incident had taken place and they were sending everyone home.  Good thing he finally told me.  I was worried about his job.  Which is awful to say now.  Something very terrible has happened.  Then it was a good thing he texted me period.  A little while later the news was blasting the event everywhere and I would have been worried about him had I not been able to get into contact with him.

So, once I knew he was ok, focus back on poor L.  He was totally ok the rest of the day.  I think he had some massive drainage going on and the bus ride did him in.  We kept his diet kind of low key most of the day.  He kind of laid around the house playing his Leap Pad and watching tv.

We had both kids' curriculum nights last night.  SIGH.  SIGH.  SIGH.  Apparently they have MASSIVELY changed the way they grade in our school district.  They weigh test scores much more heavily now, which is not good for my girl.  She is a hard worker.  She does all of homework and tries very hard, but is not a good test taker.

I was kind of surprised to see her Language Arts teacher is covered in tats up one arm.  Threw me off a little last night.  Also, the fact that I'm older than him too.  I think this is starting to become a trend.  That means I'm getting old......

We really don't have to talk about the scale do we?  Like I said yesterday, I have gained a half of pound and it hasn't moved in a while.  This is really frustrating to me, but I also know what I'm doing wrong, so if I want it to change then I need to stop what I'm doing wrong to make it better!!!!  I miss the honeymoon phase!!!!!! 

Did I tell you P has a new role at work?  He is a team leader.  I think he is really going to like his new position and his team.  He took doughnuts into work this morning, more specifically Krispy Kremes!!  Mmmmm, doughnuts.  We like Krispy Kreme.  For a couple of reasons.  One, um, they taste awesome.  But, more importantly, they are totally nut free!!  Yep, we can walk in there and our boy can have any of the doughnuts without worry!!  It kind of rocks!

Today is Friday!!!  Friday is always a good day right??  We kept L home just for good measure (even though I think he could have went to school).  So, if I do any errands today, I have a 6 year old in tow. 

Lots of plans this weekend and hopefully no sickness detours us!  L has his first Tiger Cub meeting tonight.  His uncle (my hubby's youngest brother) is the leader of his den.  This is so awesome to me!  For so many reasons.  First, the meetings are at his house and he has already let the other parents know that a child in the den has a severe peanut allergy and that they need to be cognizant of that before coming.  Second, my in-laws are well versed in L's autism, so if he needs a break from an activity, he can walk away without being judged.  Also, since he knows their house, he can walk away to a place he knows :)  Lastly (and most importantly), he will grow closer to his uncle and his cousin with my hubby in the scouting world.  My daughter and I did Girl Scouts for 5 years (this is our first year NOT doing scouts) and we grew very close to the other scouts and moms.  I anticipate this for my boys and for them to do it with family, can only be good :)  I'm very excited for them! 

P has a family day scheduled at work tomorrow.  Not sure in the light of everything if it's still planned.  If so, we plan on going with the kids.  M's been there before when she was little, but L's never been.  Also, Finding Nemo in the theatre has never been seen by L.  He wasn't born yet ;)  So, I think that may need to be in order.  Oh and of course we may have to take advantage the cider mill again.

Have a good day everyone!  I know I plan on it!

Don't feel like blogging

I've gained a half a pound. I've been snacking too much.

My port/band area has been sore the last few days.

I'm worried. Probably for no reason.

Then I read other people talk about other people's band issues (not even their own).

Then I worry more.

Why am I sore?

I'm grouchy.

Then my kid gets sick on the bus.

I'm done complaining now.

There are Band Rules for a Reason

If you haven't discovered this yet, then you and your band are living in perfect harmony.

I on the other hand, have unfortunately discovered it.

Band lesson #12 (is that what I'm on, I've lost track): when your office tells you to eat your protein first, it's probably for good reason!! Oh yes, I'm not too bad at following most of the rules. But, I tend to be a breaker every now and then. The other night we decided to have food out. Well, they had fast food, I had a egg substitute veggie omlete from one of local restaurants. I had the very smallest amout of hashbrowns and a half of piece of toast on my plate as well (gave the other 3 halves of toast and the TON O' hashbrowns to P).

Did I follow the rules?? Nope. At the other stuff first. Consequences? I had to wait FOREVER while that stuff moved through my band before I could eat the omlete. Which means it had to go in the fridge and be rewarmed (not the same:-/).

So, am I learning? Yes! Because I didn't try to eat after I got full. So I "listened to my band". Do I still have a lot to learn?

Apparently.

Ten Things Thursday (TTT)

1.  :)  Not only did I get my major goal of 75, I flew past it!  I was 74.8 yesterday, today 76!!  Yippie!!

2.  School pics today for my 7th grader.  She didn't want to wear anything too fancy and do anything too fancy with her hair.  So, we made sure to iron the same shirt she wore the first day of school and curled her hair a bit today.  Oh, and mascara and lip gloss of course!

3.  I am finally on the mend!!  Can I say thank goodness for steroids and antibiotics?!!  The steroids have cleared up my head like crazy, but they are keeping me up at night.  I cannot stand the side effects.  My poor hubby caught what I had and was going to try to tough it out and not take his meds, he didn't make it.  Started his doses last night....oh and one more thing.  The doctor has me taking liquid antibiotics just to make it easier on my stomach/lap band.  YUCK!!  My poor kids, all these years they've been taking this stuff.  Yucky......

4.  My parents are celebrating their 38th wedding anniversary tomorrow!!  How awesome is that!!

5.  My little guy.  What am I going to do with him??  Special needs, well, they aren't much fun sometimes.  I keep getting notes home that he has at least one time out.  So, we had a good little discussion last night.  Hopefully he remembers everything we talked about and it gets better.  Good thing his teachers are so awesome.  They don't get paid enough, I'm sure!

6.  The weather has been so lovely and we have been so couped up in the house with both parents being sick.  The kids have been well.  I think allergies are starting to get to the two of them, but other than that they've managed not to get what we have.  Knock on wood...if I believed in that stuff ;)

7.  I wish money grew on trees.  P has a new job at work and is at training all week.  He got a tiny bump in pay, and when I say tiny, I mean tiny.  But, soon enough all his little overtime that we love we hear is going to go away.  If that happens, well it's back to work for this SAHM.  Which is fine, except my kids really like me being at home with them.  Luckily I have an awesome relationship with the company I work for and do several projects here and there for them, so I can somewhat come and go.  Never really full time.  So, it works for us.  Hopefully when I need to something will be there.  Actually I have already began praying.  God knows my needs and I know He can provide them.  He always does.

8.  Hoping to do some fun things again this weekend.  We also need to do a little work again.  I've been on a cleaning jag.  Getting things all straightened up before winter hits.  Feels like it's going to be here before I know it.  M's room needs some serious organizing.  L's does too.  Actually all of his toys, AGAIN.  Why is that a never ending battle??  Also, Finding Nemo in 3D starts Friday!!  Who's going???  L wasn't born when it came out in the theatre's the first time.  I jumped out of my skin when Bruce appeared for the first time.  Can't imagine what he'll look like in 3D!!  Hmmmm, maybe the cider mill again....might really need to make that a thing......

9.  Gas is so stinkin' expensive, right??  I haven't been anywhere this week except the doctor!  So, I guess that's the advantage of being sick.  I've saved gas.  Silver lining.......

10.  I need some new ideas for dinner.  I'm kinda getting sick of making the same things over and over again.  I do look at pinterest often, but as a bandster and someone trying to eat a little more healthy, some of those recipes just don't cut it.  Wondering what some of your favorite things to make are!

Have a great Thursday!!!

One of My Favorite Bloggers

Well, I have a bunch of you now :) I feel like I am becoming a part of a community, a sisterhood of people who understand what I'm going through and genuinely care :) Awww :) And we can laugh at each other too :) Wish I was coming to Chicago!!!!!!! Anyways.......

The very first blog I read when I was making my decision on whether or not to have this lap band installed (yep, I said installed ha!) was Lap Band Gal's! I read every evening for several days and started from the beginning. And "watching" her go through it helped me see I could do it too. And if you read a post of mine from earlier today, you can see it's working for me too :)

Lap Band Gal has a giveaway on her blog today you can be a part of for $25 credit to planetgear.com towards new workout clothes. I know a bunch of us that are reading each others blogs have been dropping weight like crazy and we are all dropping sizes lately, time for new clothes!!!  There are several ways to enter.

Have fun and good luck!!

Quick Blog

I'm feeling better already with one dose of meds!!! Hopefully 100% soon!!

But, the real reason I wanted to blog is because of what I saw on the scale this morning!!!!

74.8.......ohhhhh I am sooooo close to a major milestone!! I was really hoping to reach it before school started but I was pretty close (we are in our second week of school).

I'm super happy with my numbers but as I was tracking them this morning I noticed my averages are starting to decrease. A few weeks ago I was averaging over 3 lbs a week, which I know is above the average for a lap bander, now I'm averaging 2.77 lbs per week. I need to be kinder to myself.

I will say I am TOTALLY thrilled!!!!! Yeah!!!! I've NEVER lost this much weight. :)

Try #2 at today's blog

So I tried to blog earlier today and my phone erased it :-/

So, here I am sitting at the PCP office waiting to be seen and blogging. My back is good (thanks for your kind words). But, what I thought was my allergies I now think is a full on something infection. Sigh. And to make it worse, I think I passed it on to P. So I called this morning and of course he had nothing open. I told the appointment taker that I had a brand new lap band and this was the first time I've been sick with it. I really wanted to see my doctor. So, she emailed him and he fit me in.

Sinus infection. Yuck. So, here I sit waiting for scripts. Tiny pills to dry up my head and liquid antibiotic. And I'm contagious. So, I'm going to let the kids kinda stay in other rooms so that I don't pass on these germs to them!! No reason to be sick at the beginning of the school year!

Did I tell you the scale moved finally? Just a bit, but it did move. 73.2! I'll take it.

Ok, I'm gonna go now and drive around and hope that the meds are done. Ready to crawl back into bed. Sigh. It's such a nice day out. My luck.

My week

My week in a nutshell (and run-on sentence) consisted of the following:
kids started school, fell back to sleep after shutting off alarm, son did awesome in pinewood derby at church, daughter already doing well in homework, daughter ran for 17 minutes straight in gym class (big time for her, she was quite proud and I'm going to keep encouraging her), I managed to clean out my closet, wash several loads of clothes passed down to me and for my son, made dinner at home a good portion of the week, became quite frustrated with the scale as it hardly moved this week at all, we put our pool away, cleaned out a shed together, I cleaned out the garage today and very much surprised my husband by doing so, doing that makes me happy first because he does so much for us, second because it needed cleaning so badly and lastly because I moved for two hours straight, I think I may have hurt my back in the process, my allergies stink so horribly right now, fall weather is creeping in and am excited for maybe a little side trip with the family tomorrow (I'll try to take some pics), Popsicles are my friends today and although my choices are ah, ok today so far I'm managing to stay within my numbers (except maybe carbs - errrr carbs).

Whew! Got all that! Hey girls (& guys) I'm thinking most of my readers tend to be of the female persuasion, I just want to thank you for always being so kind and encouraging!! You all rock so much!!

P.S. I turned my word verification off :)

TTT

1.  I should have won mom of the year yesterday. I set my alarm for the proper time, when it went off I shut it off. Promptly thought, hmmmm, I have a few minutes to lay here before I have to get them up.  Then fell right back to sleep. Then didn't wake up until they should have been walking out the door for their buses. I immediately went into panic mode. Luckily, L was being an awesome listener got dressed (shorts on backwards that needed help), went to the bathroom, etc. with little encouragement. M was awesome too. She's old enough to get herself completely out of the house, breakfast, lunch, etc. so, while I was getting him out the door for his bus, she got herself ready. I told her I would drive her so she would have some extra time.

2.  Fail #2 came when L's ASD teacher called and said, "Mrs. S, you didn't pack L a lunch and he's in the lunchroom crying saying you are coming to get him." Now every year since my daughter started kindergarten I could be accused of being an overcommunicator, but I thought maybe that was annoying. Apparently, she had forgotten that he had an appt. with the opthamologist and I didn't remind her.  That's not her fault, it's mine.  And, I had totally planned on being there BEFORE his lunch to pick him up.  I had a note that stated his lunch was a certain time.  Well, it is if he's in his gen ed class.  But, he goes to lunch with this ASD class, like 40 mins. earlier!!!!!  No one told me that and I had reminded her, I probably would have found that out.  FAIL!!!!

3.  L's eye appt. didn't go quite like I thought it would.  L had exotropia of his left eye has infant/baby. 

See the left eye how it isn't looking straight on.  It was so sad.  At 11 months, he had eye muscle surgery.  Before the surgery, we had patches on his eye and glasses.  He looked like Chicken Little :)  Well, the other day they are noticing a new/old problem.  His left eye is now drifting up instead of out.  It has done this before, but not to the severity it was the other day.  So, now we keep an eye on it (no pun intended).  Instead of a yearly appointment, we go back in 6 months, then again 6 months after that.  If it looks good, then obviously nothing.  If it stays the same or gets worse we are looking at another surgery in about a year.  This really isn't a surprise.  When he was a baby we were warned most kids that start off having surgeries like these end up with more than one in their lifetimes.

4.  My kids are adjusting to school very well.  My daughter just rocks let me tell you!  She comes straight home, straight to her room and rocks out her homework first thing so she can watch tv, play DS, do whatever for the rest of the night!  Proud of that kid!  L is doing ok.  It's harder for him to adjust.  But, he seems to have a pretty decent attitude and I will take that any day of the week!

5.  Cleaned out my closet yesterday and have almost 2 garbage bags full of clothes that are too big.  I'm thinking I'm down like a size and a half to 2 sizes.  I know it's weird.  Some things 2 sizes, but some things, not quite 2 sizes.

6.  Haven't been getting my water in lately.  Really working on it today.  Not a fan.  What is your favorite way to drink water?

7.  It's supposed to cool down a bit here and there, that means it's getting closer to fall, which means it's time for the cider mill!!!  Love this time of year.  For 3/4 of us in this house it means it's birthday time.  With 5 weeks it's mine, L's and P's birthdays.  It was that way for me growing up in my house too, except, I was the odd man out.  My parents and brother are all within 12 days of each other.

8.  Pinewood Derby Races were at church last night.  Our little man did really well.  He won 2 out of 3 heats he was in.  He made a red Angry Bird car.  It was very cute.  He won a participation trophy.

9.  I made an Italian Chicken pinterest recipe the other night.  The chicken was super moist.  That's about the best thing I can say about it.

10.  Going to leave some progress photos.  An old pic from a couple of years ago and one from today. 

My babies :) and other stuff.....

Who aren't really babies anymore. :( Yesterday was the first day of school here and we had everything ready (or at least we thought we did). On Monday night I realized L needed pictures to take to both his 1st grade gen ed class about his summer and for his ASD class about who he is. So, I sat down at the lap top ready to print out pictures then realized we were out of ink. Sigh. Then had to hunt down a disk to put pics on to run up to CVS to print them.

They were all ready to go! They both actually leave the house at the same time because L has a special bus route that picks him up right at our house while M's bus stop is only a few houses down. Lucky for her, she got a 3 hour delay yesterday because they let the 6th graders go in the first day by themselves for a bit to get the lay of the land and the cafeteria to themselves. I sat with M at the bus stop for a bit so I could get a look at her bus number to remind her of it (she tends to be a tad forgetful like her dad) and because by the time it was her turn to go to school, it was POURING!!!

Onto band stuff. Being very honest, my head hunger has taken over and I have to quiet that voice inside. Yesterday I snacked a lot but kept track of everything. I have been REALLY good at keeping track of everything up until this last week. Yesterday I went a little over on my fat grams but stayed within my calories. My protein was good. Dropped some weight again today. I have to remind myself why I've been doing this and not allow myself to go back. I've made such awesome progress and want to continue to do so!! Onward and upward!

I'm including pics of the kids' first day. It was M's first day of 7th grade and L's first day of 1st grade. Wait til I tell you what I did this morning, already. Sigh.

First day of school and I'm a bad lap bander!!!

Lots to say, will update more tomorrow. With pics :)

Been off track a bit, need to get on my track again. Got down to 71.2. Gained back 1.2. I realize that's not a lot, but it's a VERY slippery slope. I see a bad pattern.

Hope everyone had a nice, restful weekend!!!

Blogging

I haven't blogged in a few days.  A little bit busy, a little bit lazy, a little bit MAYBE doesn't want to be accountable.......I've been wavering up and down a bit right around that 70 mark....70.4, 70, 70.2.  I know what I'm doing wrong.  I've also this week not felt well, it took me a couple of days to feel better, that wasn't fun at all!

So, since I missed 10 things Thursday and today is Saturday, how about I could do either 6 or 16 things Saturday (ha!)....let's see how it goes!!!

1.  70 lbs. lost in 6 months is HUGE for me, I've never done it!  Not once in my entire adult life, I should reward myself, but I don't know how.  I really hate spending money since we've been trying to pay stuff off lately......

2.  Kids are back to school on Tuesday.  Most things have been bought.  L still needs new socks and M needs some new shoes.  She picked out some cute pink Converse, but alas, she has her mother's wide feet and likes being comfortable so she said no!!

3.  L had TWO, yes TWO supply lists!  One for his general ed classroom and one for his ASD classroom, which we visited on Wednesday.  Apparently both ASD teachers are new to the building.  I really hope this is a GREAT year for him.

4.  I am basically "training" L's general ed teacher on food allergies.  It feels like she's never had any kids with them in her class.  This is not necessarily a bad thing.  I get to tell her the way I like things done to keep him safe vs. the way other people have allowed their children to stay safe (which may not be as high of a standard as mine).

5.  M's "preppy" look shopping went really well.  You should see the cute clothes she picked out.  I'll post some pics as she wears them!  She has cute taste, even at 12!

6.  P has a 3 day weekend, which means the pool comes down, some family time and some sleeping in.  He's still asleep now and that's 4 hours later than he usually does :)  He gets up REALLY early.

7.  We had thought about taking our kids to the local Renaissance Festival, but my mother-in-law made mention that she thinks that the turkey legs are fried in peanut oil.  Sigh.  So, I called the offices.  The response I got, "Oh, I don't work there.  But, if you tell them your dietary restrictions, they can let you know."  Ok wait, didn't you just answer the phone for the festival??  I'm thinking you should know the stuff for the festival like this?  AND, I really didn't feel like explaining to her that I'm not spending $50 to just into the place to turn around and find out that 100's of people are walking around with what could potentially be death meat sticks!  The problem is we don't know how sensitive he is, because he is SO allergic according to his tests, so if someone holds something with peanut oil, touches a surface and then he comes along and touches the same surface, what kind of reaction is he going to have?  I can't protect him for forever, he's eventually going to make choices of his own, but right now I can and I get choose what we do!

****I'm talking a lot about food allergies today, huh??  It happens.****

8.  Today, I think we are going to go with friends somewhere.  This girl has been my best friend since we practically babies.  Not sure what's in store today, but I'm sure it'll be fun.

9.  Finally got my kid's bus times, because L has a special bus route, both kids leave at the same time.  Mornings should be fun around here.  Advantage, they will both be leaving at the same time!!

10.  No band issues this week, other than not drinking enough water.  My new restriction has changed how much I can gulp.  I used to be able to drink a bottle of water in like 4 drinks.  Not anymore.....

11.  I saw my husband's grandfather in the grocery store yesterday and I don't think I've seen him since before my surgery.  He asked how much I've lost and I told him.  He told me I look good.  I think this is a big confidence booster for me that people are starting to notice constantly.

12.  I need to start cleaning out my clothes, but then I would be naked and well, nobody wants to see that.  I have clothes a friend gave me, but I suspect they are still too small at least 30 lbs. away before they fit.

13.  Trying a new crockpot recipe today I got off of Pinterest.  I love Pinterest.  I love my crockpot.  Except, I hate cleaning it.  Thank goodness for a dishwasher.  Italian chicken with potatoes and carrots.

14.  Band related, been snacking.  Shouldn't be, but my restriction is so good, can't get away with too much.

Ok, I'm done....I don't want to keep boring you with random facts from me, I wish I could think of something REALLY good and juicy.  I have nothing really, really good band related to say.

TTFN!!

Hi

Not on schedule.  Nope.  Not at all.

Ate crappy yesterday.

Really not feeling well today.  Not at all.  Sigh.

So, lap band lesson (what number am I on, like #10?), don't fall off the track too far....you'll get sick!  Duh.

So today I'm nursing myself back to health.  Still am not quite on my plan, but not eating the crap I ate yesterday.

Guess I was feeling sorry for myself.....bad pattern.  Lesson #11.......sigh.

Please don't feel the need to pity me and leave a comment......I'll be ok!!  I just need to get it together!!

Don't know if I really should blog or not today.....

.....if you need an uplifting, sweet, encouraging post, then I suggest clicking off of my post today, because it will not be ANY of those things.

I've decided that having a lap band is like being married.  Yep, I'm married to my lap band.  And I was so in the honeymoon stage there for a while.  Right now, we are definitely in the first year of marriage.  Ya know, where you are finally living together and are like, are you really like this for real???  Figuring each other out, likes and dislikes, etc. 

A couple of weeks ago when I was supposed to have a group therapy session at the clinic (remember, it ended up being a one-on-one), my psychologist asked me a question, would I do it again?  With no hesitation, I answered her, YES!  This weekend if she would have asked me, I would have thought a little longer.  My answer would still be yes.  But, man, we are DEFINITELY out of that honeymoon stage and are arguing right now.

I had a VERY unhappy weekend.  Without going into too much of a vent or complaining too much, I had a couple of stuck episodes, yes you read right a couple of them and a PB episode that followed my poor baby girl's birthday party.  Which I didn't get to enjoy as much as I would have liked because I felt like crap.

My hubby had to pull over on the side of the road so I could puke.  Fun.

I will say I did feel much better after, but still, who wants to puke?  Nobody does.

I'm losing weight like no other.  I think I've lost like 5 lbs. in the last week.  I'm down a total of 70 lbs. now.

And well, I know it's not my band's fault.  It's mine.  But, I can still be an irrational woman for a second, feel sorry for myself a second and sad for a second.  We all have those pity party moments and right now, I'm in one.

I told my husband yesterday, for the first time in a LONG time, I miss eating (food addict).  I couldn't even see my poor kid get her favorite present this season from her Nana and Papa (it was in their car because it was a large gift and we were at a restaurant) because I was too busy crying in the car because I was hurting and feeling sorry for myself. 

Will I get over it?  Absolutely!  Is it worth it?  Absolutely!  It's just a brief moment in time.  The difference between now and every other time I've tried to lose weight is that I have this little thing in me that WON'T let me give up!

Thank goodness..........

My Blog Buddies are So Smart :)

Yes, they are :)

Have you met adorkbly delish or Lapping the Band?

Well, both left comments for me on my last post about how maybe it's not that I maybe need an unfill, but that I ate too much and what I ate.

Guess what?  My NP said the EXACT same thing!!  So, after talking with her (and almost crying in the clinic), she had me go have lunch and call her an hour later.  If I was still feeling crappy, I was supposed to call her.  This weekend I'm supposed to eat normally, if I start feeling like crap, go to full liquids and call her on Monday.

But, I think she's right.  My portion sizes need to go WAY down.  Duh.  And I have not had any issues with any stuck foods at all (except potatoes...which were fine the other day, but the way....before the fill) except now that may not be the case anymore. 

I need to be eating only like a 1/4 cup and kielbasa, well, I guess it's pretty fiberous, so yeah, might be a stuck food.

I am concerned still about not getting enough calories or protein.  She said right now I just want you to focus on eating a well balanced meals and we will worry about the numbers later.  I think she knows I'm just trying to wrap my head around the whole thing and I need to take it only one step at a time.  Get the portion thing down first, THEN worry about the numbers later.

I lost more weight.  I'm down 68.2. 

So, please be patient with me while I'm figuring this out.  I'm still new at this too :)

Feels like I'm starting all over again...........

Too good to be true....

Well, I need an unfill. Yep, there's too much in my band. I was sooooooo miserable at dinner tonight it wasn't even funny.

I got through lunch just fine. It took me a little longer to eat, but it's supposed to and I thought ok, this is good. I had 2 oz. of shrimp and 2 oz. of watermelon and a light string cheese. So all in all almost 5 oz. worth of food.

At dinner my family had hot dogs, I had a Hillshire Farm Turkey Polska Kielbasa. It has like 100 calories, 4.5g of fat and 10g of protein, pretty good. Tastes pretty good too. About halfway through I should have stopped eating. I should have known better, but did I listen to my band? Nope! Even took a few bites of the squash I had on the side.

Bad idea.  Because I spent the next hour to hour and a half miserable. Saying things like stupid band. Like its my band's fault. Sigh.

I also have had, what I'm guessing is one of my mini-migraines (haven't had one in a while), going on my 3rd day now.

Ok I'm done complaining. Sorry to vent. Carry on.